Since I was little I wanted to be a baseball player, I didn't make it
So I learned to strike hits over a track
I started drinking alcohol in my office again
I write good when I'm sober, but I write better when drunk
When I fall into depression, I tell my problems to the plane's window
Stress has got me sick, I haven't slept in ten years
The IRS is still investigating me
And I'm going through divorce, but it doesn't matter, I'm still rhyming
I make mistakes, but I do the best I can
I learned to land without any wheels, and
Despite that people recognize me in the streets, not even my friends know me any more.
I'm sad and I laugh
The concert is sold out, but I'm empty
In the music industry, everything's a lie
My son's got to eat, so I'm still touring
I'm just left with what I've got, I don't know where I'm going, but I know where I come from
I grew up with Christopher, my friend
We threw stones together and broke a pair of windows
We used to run shirtless in the streets in the neighborhood of Trujillo, while riding a bike downhill
The bike over the mud, with a plastic cup in the wheel's rim so it sounded like a car
We used to get refueled with Indian Malt 2 and garlic bread, nobody would stop us
We were inseparable until one day he was killed by four cops
My joy is still broken, the lights went out in the ballpark
There's almost no one left here
Sometimes I don't want to be here
I feel alone here
In the middle of the party, I want to be where nobody bothers me
To Burn my notebook, let go of my backpacks
I want to dial the 7-5-5-0-8-2-2, just to see who answers
The fights with my stepfather, when he lost control
I used to solve them watching a baseball game together with him
He invited me to fistfights a couple of times
I sneaked out of home a couple of times
But the food was never absent, he defended us with music, singing in weddings
Sometimes baked, sometimes canned and microwaved
We used to share it all, the table was round
Middle-to-lower class, we never were owners
The bank loans robbed all our dreams
The savings account was empty, but mom would brighten our days by dancing flamenco
She stopped acting just to take care of us four
And we became her stage play
She walked in our boots, and her life was made of our achievements and defeats,
My stepfather left, with other people
We moved out of the 13th street
I left home to search any luck in haystack, and I packed my whole life in a box
I received a scholarship in the Arts University
Half of my friends were killed
I started to rap again, started to believe again
I came back, released an album, ate the world in one bite
In Puerto Rico they fired employees, I insulted the governor and it came out on TV
They censored four years of my calendar
Grandma died, she didn't see me play in the stadium
I said everything I felt, they love me more outside than inside my own country
But even if my songs are sung by a german guy
I want to be buried in my old San Juan
I may hide my sorrow, but I'm made of rice and pigeon peas 3
And it hurts, it doesn't matter if the morning rum consoles me
And from deep inside me, if I ever fucked up, I dedicate four floors 4 of apologies to my country.
There's almost no one left here
Sometimes I don't want to be here
I feel alone here
In the middle of the party, I want to be where nobody bothers me
To Burn my notebook, let go of my backpacks
I want to dial the 7-5-5-0-8-2-2, just to see who answers
And if they answer me, I want to tell them that I want to come back
That I want to get out of this hotel and disappear
And if they answer me, I want to tell them that I want to pull the curtains
And that sometimes my blood pressure rises, and I'm scared that my plane falls down
That I don't care about the tours, the albums, the Grammys
And that I want to see the Halley comet again with mommy on the 11th Street
I want to go back to when my windows were sunny, and the warmness would wake me up
To when they called me out to play, to when I rapped without getting paid
I want to get the baseball cards out of the box, go back to steal second base again
In the summer and christmas, to clean the house with my brothers while listening to Rubén Blades
I want to return, go to the cinema in the weekdays and get to Art School next morning
I want to stay there, I don't want to get out of there
I want to go back to when they wouldn't let me in because I was badly dressed
I want to feel again, when I didn't have to pretend
I... want to be Me again
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